Hermina Vlasopolos - April 9, 1984
Discussing Love in the Camp
"After a long time, when we were already well in the second work camp, sometimes at night we tried to talk about other subjects besides food, food, food and shivering and fear. I liked to talk to Flora. She was clever and one of the people who still kept her human dignity. "Flora, you have a husband and you came here with your child. I have no husband or children, but I have a fiancé I used to love very much, but for a month I haven't had any feelings for him at all. All my love is gone and there is nothing left in my heart. When you think of your child, have you still the same warm feelings as before? Do you still love your husband?" Flora didn't answer for a long while. She was deep in thought. She was a very interesting woman. Her hair had grown, hair had grown a little, it was blue black. She had a strong aquiline nose and a flattened chin. She wasn't a beautiful woman, but two sparklingly intelligent green eyes light, lighting the dark complex pleasant face gave it an un...unusual charm. "It is strange that you're asking me a question I've been asking myself for quite awhile over and over again. No, I don't feel anything. I know I love my husband, I know, but the thought of my child not being alive anymore should drive me crazy, but it doesn't. I don't feel my heart warm up when I think of them. It's like having a big empty space in there. How can I explain that?" So Flora too had acknowledged the complete loss, the complete loss of our faculty to love. We tried to talk about other things as if the subject was too scary, but we came back to it again and again, trying to understand it by sharing our thoughts. We decided not to talk to the others. It was no use in making them aware of another distressing aspect of our life."
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