Voice/Vision Holocaust Survivor Oral History Archive

Esfir Lupyan - December 17, 2007

Speaking About Experiences

And you... Did anyone ask you what happened, after the war? Did anyone know what you experienced?

What, what I tell you, I...

You didn't talk.

...I don't want touch this subject.

But did anyone ask about it?

Yeah, yeah. I don't want to touch, uh... I could not talk about that. And then people, people who is okay, is okay um, they, they don't want ask us because they know what happened. Russian people, Russian people and Belorussian people, they not really believe what, what, what actually, actually what happened and what we... I, I, I never talk about that. And even, even it was no literature, when no movies about what happened, movie was like comedy, you know, comedy. It was not true and it was... Maybe because people don't want again suffer, I don't know. Not much talk about that, but people who, who survive, people who knows each other uh, in ghetto, and like people from, you know, who mentioned here and they found each other, they took a lot, a lot, but under closed door. It was not open. You know, we are... In, in Minsk, we not feel like we are free people. We could not talk what we want and we know that people don't want listen us. We, we lie. Everybody lie in Minsk. And not only Minsk, in, in Soviet Union. Everybody lie all life. Not because they liar but because life put them in frame. If you want to say true, go on north, go and stay there. If you want to, to tell you truth. You know about ???

Mm-hm.

You know ??? Like my father could tell much, much more and much more true than he did. That was--like my father said--that was flower but buried, he didn't... You know, nobody in this country tell. Tell truth. Even if you were honest, crystal honest, and you want to, you have to go immigrate or you have to hide somewhere your memor... memorizes. Hide or wait.

So, you... [interruption in interview]


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