Voice/Vision Holocaust Survivor Oral History Archive

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Pauline Kleinberg - October 28, 1982

My daughter's in California. When she watched The Holocaust she called me right after--she called me crying, "Mom, did you watch? Is this what you were part of?" I said, "How do you think your grandparents got killed and your aunts and uncles uh, and, and aunts got killed?" You know? It's uh, uh, but still I hadn't--I never sat down with them and told them. I think probably I...I'm afraid to hurt myself or hurt them, that's why. I mean, I, I can't say the explanation why, because I do want the legacy to forward, because I know we're not going to be here forever and it's going to be forgotten. Or like--when I was one time--when I watched Exodus, I heard a lady in back of me said, "Oh, what a sad story." You know, it's like a sad story. That's what, you know, where the Exodus, uh, what happened with the survivors on before we had Israel. And this will be another sad story. And, and later on some people, I heard of Americans, they don't want to hear about it. They heard a lot about the Holocaust, you know, it's like such a little thing--such minimizing it. And I probably--the only explanation I can give myself that I don't want to hurt the children, I don't want to hurt myself anymore, that I haven't told them enough about it.

I'm sure it was very difficult for you to share with me what you have tonight.

I was prepared. I built myself up for it, because I knew it's the last chance. You know what? When this professor--which one was it?

Bolkosky.

Bolkosky called me and he said, I--and we were so pressed on time--you know, we were invited tonight too. I thought, "If I have to stay one more day"--which we hadn't got where--probably have to stay--live out of the car because we had to leave the keys the 3rd. I thought to myself, then I would buy time in a hotel to record this. Uh, it--for my children, for anybody else's children, for somebody, I hope it's going to be recorded somewhere, some time that someone is going to read it, and, and that's not enough because I haven't told everything. But I think the principle things you got from mine uh, surviving.