Miriam Monczyk-Laczkowska Ferber - December 7, 1999
Relations with Non-Jews
Tell me a little bit about that, I mean. Did you feel any awkwardness with knowing that there may have been some anti-Semitism among the, among the village people?
You see, I was very fortunate Sidney. I tell you why. It was a communist country. Uh, they couldn't say out loud what they thought. So when I used to go to Poland, I was safe. Even though the Jewish community here were saying, oh, she's going to the goyim, she's going to the goyim and why she's going there and eh, Rebino Shal Olam. I was safe. Now I'm not. Because now, since few years ago, you know, Poland became democratic. Now they can tell you exactly what they think of you. They can do to you whatever they want because it's a free country.
Free country. Maybe there are some things that...
Right.
ought to be repressed.
So I will, I, I was not persecuted. I was not. If somebody said about me--you know. And the fact that I was pretty and, and talented and, and doing all these wonderful things helped a lot.
Sure.
You understand? Maybe if I was a little lemish, you know, overweight with some uh, pimples on my--they would say, oh, the, the, the Jew, you know. I was the beautiful Jew, ok.
And it built your confidence.
Yes. And I was very confident. I was not walking around like a lemish, you know, with my head down. I was not advertising the fact, you know. But when somebody asked, are you something, I right away said, "I'm Jewish."
Did you know any other Jews?
No.
No, so you were it.
I was it.
Of course there, there were probably no Jews left in Sosnowiec after the war.
There were c...couple, few couples. But, you know, they looked at me from far away. I remember they looked at me and they were kind of pointing me out that I'm Jewish too. But they never had the guts to come up to me or I never came up to them. I was mad at them, I told you.
Yeah.
Because they didn't have time for me when I needed them. So now I didn't need them anymore.
Was there a rabbi there?
No.
All right--no. So there was really nobody to talk to.
No. I knew nothing about Jewish religion. I knew I was a chosen one. I knew that, that eh, uh, my place is not among these, these Polacks. That one day I, I, I have to--I don't know. I have to do something and that's it.
Did you read the Bible?
I read the Bible stories because they are wonderful stories. But uh, uh, I had nothing to do with the, with the church at that point. If I went to church I went for its beauty. Uh, I went by myself, not during the, the Mass. Or not during any, you know, sermons. I went because, eh, the surroundings and the, the--you know, just a beauty of it I like.
Awesome.
Yes. I still visit all the churches whenever I go.
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